This painting just never came together for me...feels pretty and blah right now
I guess trolling around Pinterest and Etsy has it's dangers. I look at all the gifted artists is out there and then I start comparing my work... It is a slippery slope.
Then I received my big shipment of new canvases today and instead of feeling excited, I felt discouraged.
"What am I doing?"
"Who do I think I am?"
"What if nothing ever happens and I'm stuck with a hundred paintings that no one wants?"
I feel this and yet I'm not totally panicked...because this time (yes, this has happened before)...this time, I know what it is. It is resistance.
Every artist feels it from time to time. Even the most famous and successful artists get fight "imposter complex". It's part of the job.
Tonight, I painted a canvas mushy yellow and walked away... I'm dry. I don't know what I want to make. I will wait.
I will try to lay off the social media sites for a bit and think clearly for a few days. Maybe my Juices will return.
I listen to a podcast called "Creative Pep Talk" and today he mentioned finding your "voice". It 's in the spaces between the wildly different types of art that you really love. In that case, somewhere between Lisa Golightly and Rex Ray is where I belong.
Which means that I'd better attempt to do the thing that I am avoiding, practicing figure and portrait drawings. This I have been avoiding.
So onward, and I hope not downward. I guess I'd better spend some time with my sketch book. Sigh.